Cautionary tale for prospective parents

John Scalzi wrote a one-month retrospective of parenthood several years ago, and for some reason decided to post it on his blog:

Athena celebrated her one month birthday last Saturday by spitting up what she had been drinking and then staying up all night and making a lot of noise. This pleased me immensely; she's already preparing for college life. Her mother and I, on the other hand, spent some time trying to encapsulate the whole parent-child relationship thus far, something that defines everything we are as caregivers and custodians of this small being. Here's what we've come up with so far: "John and Kristine: We haven't dropped her yet!" Which is absolutely true as far as Krissy knows, and I'll thank you not to tell her any differently.

We're also trying to explain life with baby to our unprogenated friends, who are curious, and understandably so. Having a baby is like suddenly sprouting a second head: The attention you get at the start is nice, but at the end of it, it's just another mouth to feed. Our friends want to know if the benefits outweigh the detriments. If they are one day to have children of their own (or, alternately, graft another head onto their spinal column), they need to have some inkling of what it's like, in terms they can appreciate.

I can't help them with that second head thing. But the parenthood issue is another matter. Here's what I tell them: One month in, it's like having another pet. And not a very clever pet at that — at this point in her life, Athena is the fifth smartest mammal in the house, after the dog and the cat.

Athena is now a bit older, and therefore much closer to the point that "will cause some therapist somewhere to give Athena the once over and think: Here's how I'm getting that new sailboat."